This is the last in this series of blog posts. The list of ways that people can hurt one another is really endless. Group leaders have a tough responsibility to make it happen as best they can. I'm grateful.
Person at a group is talking about their job, and how disrespectfully they are treated by their boss. "The boss is a jerk! I have a college degree, and I'm working on my Masters. I don't need some high school dropout trying to tell me what I need to work on!"
Yep, they're angry and insensitive. They didn't think about others at the group who had never attended college or who had not finished high school. Facilitator noticed immediately, but they were stunned. They couldn't believe it, and really didn't know what to say.
Facilitator called each person. "Hey. I have a responsibility to keep the group safe. I missed it last night. I saw the potential for hurt, but I didn't stop it. I'm sorry." In all cases, the response was positive. They all had indeed noticed, and yeah, it hit some of them as it's the area in which they've held some personal insecurity. They said that they understood the anger and insults weren't directed at them personally.
Facilitator met to talk alone and in person with the one who made the comments. "I have a responsibility to keep the group safe. I missed it. You were pretty upset, and I realize that you didn't intend your words to be hurtful..." The person had been clueless to the power of their words. Yes, they felt badly. Facilitator allowed them to feel badly but didn't try to make them feel worse. It opened dialogue for further relationship.
The list of ways that people can love one another is really endless.