Because Relationships Matter

What we think is helpful...often isn't!

Some things are just so obvious...that doesn't seem to help me see them more quickly though!

I was talking with a single guy, 35-45ish years old. He was trying to understand himself and explain to me why he didn't complete the 13 weeks of FPU (Ramsey's Financial Peace University) during a previous session.

"The tables were separated as married or single, so I ended up sitting at a table of single men & women. I want to really go through it from start to finish and get this part of my life straightened out. I guess it's just me, but I have to figure out how to fit in with the people."

We talked further. I noticed how much regret and embarrassment he communicated about his financial situation. There were a lot of feelings of personal failure involved.

I asked, "Do you think you would have felt more comfortable if there hadn't been any women at the table?"

"Well, yeah!" Women aren't the problem. My guess is that there are plenty of single women who feel the same way.  

It's uncomfortable talking about finances regardless of who you're with, but it's like turning up the heat to ask those who are single to do it in the presence of the opposite gender. Duh! We thought we were doing folks a favor sitting them with others at a similiar life stage, which typically is good, but....double-duh!! 

FPU launches at the Granger campus on Monday, August 23. It's $95 (a little less than our cost for the kits) for 13 weeks, and it's worth every penny! Register here!

Oh -- we'll have tables for couples AND tables for men OR women. (We may have a student table too, and well, that's a whole different story -- they'd likely enjoy the mixed gender fun at that stage of life!)

Little known facts (a few more)

Mark wrote this post about our Financial Peace University groups. Here's a few more things that I thought might be helpful.

• It is our largest attended group environment.
• The attendance retention is the highest of our group environments.
• The price of the kits is $95, which is our cost of them, is the highest of any group environment. 
• No childcare is offered.

Of individuals, 96% were coming after 4 weeks, a drop to 75% during the week of Spring Break, returning to the 80% range for several weeks, and settling at 73% after 12 weeks. That's great retention!

It's even better when we look at households. It seems that one spouse may stop attending; they had an opportunity to work a 2nd job, to reduce childcare expenses, or lost personal interest, etc. 

Of 174 households, there are 154 households still attending after 12 weeks: 89%! 

Behind the numbers are stories. Here's one told from an FPU volunteer.

"There was a woman in crisis. She had to make a decision if she was going to try to keep her home. Many of her friends and family were telling her to walk away from it. They were telling her that she couldn't afford to keep her home.

We talked about how rent was going to be very similar to her mortgage payment. We spent time together talking through her budget. Within an hour, we found an extra $300 a month in her budget.

She looked at me and said, 'I need to keep paying my mortgage and keep my home.' It was just really good to work through that with her and have her find her way to a solution."

Last, but perhaps the best fact: the team of volunteeers does the programming, speaking, organizing, leading, caring, counseling -- heck, volunteers even set up the tables and chairs! What a great team -- I'm so proud of them!

Money & Emotions

It's very common for someone who struggles with anxiety or depression or love, to also struggle financially. Those with money problems, often have marriage or ... you get the picture.

Scenario #1: "It makes me physically ill when I have to pay bills. I have bad checks because I don't keep a register or track very well what's in my account. I don't keep track because it makes me physically ill to look at it."

What happens when they run out of money, have to go to court or pay fees for the bad checks? You guessed it, "It makes me physically ill."

Scenario #2: "I've had a lot of people help me over the years. They've helped me fix my car, given me a place to live. I really want to give back to others like all those people who have helped me. 

In response to how to change the pattern of their life, "I don't like money. Money isn't important to me. It's just not a priority."

How will they ever be in a financial position to care for themselves or to help others if handling money doesn't become a priority?

As Mark Beeson brilliantly taught, (it's the last video under 'teaching'), the condition of the heart indicates how we'll handle money. Money & emotions are inextricably linked. Positively or negatively, they feed one another. Our goal is to have them feed one another positively, but so sadly, many keep feeding them negatively. 

I am always challenged of whether they'll get more help from Turning Point or Financial Peace Univeristy. They both lauch on February 22. Where they should start isn't important as starting!

Money Story

This is a great story of life change -- small changes that can make a big difference!

Before Financial Peace, I was in charge of our finances, including all the stress.  My husband did not know where the money was going each month.  Now, we have sat down together and completed a budget.  It was very hard for me at first, because I didn't want him to actually "see" the amount of debt we had - maybe I was just scared he would point fingers at me, but that didn't happen.  We are both on the same page as to what debt we will pay off first, and we are both working toward the same goals now.

We used to eat out 3-4 times each week.  Our children were not used to sitting at home together around the dining room table.  Now, we try to only go out 1-2 times each week, usually once is after church, and each family member takes their turn at picking the restaurant.  Our boys love it!  There is no more fighting as to where we are going or who got to pick - they know that week whose turn it is!

Although all the debt is not gone, I feel as if we have a hold on it and are working to eliminate it!  Since taking the class, my husband got a different job (he was self-employed in construction), and I picked up two teaching jobs in the evening.  We have had to make sacrifices, but it is well worth it.  Our oldest son is even on the saving bandwagon - before he would spend any money he would get.  Now, he keeps a portion to spend, but places the majority in his savings account.

One of the biggest accomplishments I am most proud of is that we are finally tithing 10%, and it is coming directly off the top before any bills are paid for the week.  I truly believe that giving to God what is due to Him is the only way we will get out of debt, and we are finally headed down that path!

 

The teaching this weekend will use video teaching from Dave Ramsey. We launch Financial Peace University on February 22.

Another 90 households...

We finished another 13 week run of Financial Peace University, and over 90 households went the distance learning how to better manager their money!

Below is a snapshot from one couple: a stay at home mom and her husband who is a firefighter. You can read the amazing story from Mo's full blog post here.

In March of 2008 Andy and I took a Financial Peace University class through our church. Taking that class still stands as one of the best things we've done in our marriage....Budgeting is my crack, and I'm an addict.

....Andy and I have been on a strict budget since March of 08. Our goal is to be debt free [with the exception of our house] by spring time next year. If we stick to the plan and follow through we will have paid off 31,375 dollars in debt in two years. Debt free at the ages of 24 and 26 sounds pretty good to me. In that $30,000 we will have paid off a Jeep, a Ford, a Honda, and a furnace. So far we've knocked them all out but my Honda.

Did you catch that their primary income is that of a firefighter? She gives many details on all the things they've done to earn extra money, and the self-control they've been challenged to maintain. It's not been easy! 

While many make some changes very quickly, it's encouraging and inspiring to hear from those who are going the distance to make lasting change! Way to go Mo and Andy!

It's not about money.

If it was about teaching people some good financial coping skills, we'd give them a book or show them a video and walk away. 

It's not about money. It's about people. People matter to God. People matter to us.

Our volunteer team told me, "We want the people who attend the Financial Peace University launch to understand that this is about much more than creating a budget." We did our best to help 244 people, representing 160 househoulds, get it through this model.  

I heard from a single mom who's lived on public assistance most of her life - she's trying to break the cyle of poverty with her children - "If I can figure out a way to save the $500 emergency fund, I think this is gonna work for me."

A couple who had been at the brink of divorce only months ago stopped to tell me (while holding hands), "We're gonna make it. We're glad we came tonight. This is gonna help."

A woman still in the midst of a divorce (that she doesn't want) said, "This is gonna help me gain some dignity as I learn that I am competent and able to manage my finances."

Yeah...financial peace is about way more than money.  

Money: What people are saying

"Please pray for my finances. My unemployment is getting ready to run out. I'm not sure what I'll do."

"I wanted to go to Financial Peace University last year, but I didn't have the $95. I felt stupid. I have a good job, but I am just like my dad - I've always bought what I want when I wanted it. I have not shown any self-control. I want to give, but I can't. I want to be able to give 10%, and it's not that much, but I haven't been able to. I'm going this time."

"I don't want to live how I've been living. I have had no worth for most of my life. I was baptized here last summer. God is doing something. I can feel God's presence. My husband went to Financial Peace University last March. We're almost debt free! We've paid off $14,000 in the past year! We've been working the debt snowball! It is incredible!"

Financial Peace University launches at the GCC Granger Campus on Monday, February 23, 6:30 - 8:30. From the data of 29 households during the last session, 87 credit cards were cut up, $181,765 was paid off in non-mortgage debt, and $45,789 was added to emergency savings accounts! Seriously- 29 households!!!

Money & Purpose

Does God have a purpose for my life? What is it? Fairly common questions that get asked lots more frequently as we are confronted with the fear or reality of losing our jobs.

Why did God let this happen? He must have some other purpose for my life - now, I just have to figure out what that is? When we have belief systems that point this direction, it causes all sorts of problems. 

God's pretty clear that his purpose is to have everyone follow Jesus, and his method is us. Our purpose is to love God and love others.

God wants us to pursue vocations where we can develop into the people that we were created to be - it's through loving God and loving others that we find the peace and freedom to get there!

We heard an amazing message from our senior pastor's wife, Sheila, on the tension of between faith and financial responsibility. In speaking about her and Mark's early days, "We saved, tithed, and lived within our means. When God opened doors, we were ready to walk through. We kept taking our next step. God expects us to be responsible with our money. We honor God with personal responsibility." 

It was really helpful! I'm grateful for Mark and Sheila's faithful commitment over all these years. More next week on Money & Priorities, and more wisdom from Sheila!

Biggest Loser

The Financial Counseling Team of volunteers assigned all of the table groups to one of three teams. Data was collected (anonymously) from each household on 3 categories: amount of debt (excluding mortgage debt), number of credit cards, and amount of savings.

During the remaining weeks, the teams will compete and encourage one another as they move individually and collectively to reduce their debt to crown one team as the Biggest Loser.

Here are the statistics collected from 47 households.

• Debt (excluding mortgages): $1,295, 864
• Number of credit cards: 161
• Savings: $134,799

 

In spite of the statistics that could overwhelm them in defeat, these people are not sitting still! They are not giving up or giving in. They are moving forward with great hope! So proud of them!

Take your fun with you...

Invest 13 evenings on topics where we inventory our debt, review our savings (or lack of), and create a budget with expenses less than income. Sign me up for this fun! Did I mention there's a fee to participate?

Many who attend are managing money quite well, and just want to get better. Others are afraid, embarrassed, and just want to avoid it all. I had someone tell me this week, "I don't want anyone to know that I filed for bankruptcy. I am so humiliated."

I assured them: "We don't force you to talk. You decide what level of information you share, if any. You won't be tricked into telling others." They felt better, but I wasn't done: "Look, you need to know that as long as you allow the shame to keep you in isolation, hiding, you're believing the lies in your head. Our world says that your worth = your material crap. God says your worth = the death of Jesus. Lies produce lies. Truth produces truth. You won't be free from the lies until you accept how much you matter to God!"   

Helping people get control of their money helps people move from self-centered lives toward Christ-centered lives. Our Financial Counseling Team get it! I'm so proud of them. They know this isn't sexy stuff. So, they brainstormed and planned ways to take their fun with them!

Our next launch for Financial Peace University is just around the corner! The fun starts next Tuesday, August 19. Hope to see you there!