When you feel controlled, the tendency is to try harder to get control. This leaves you being the person trying to control others. It's very human. It's not helpful.
Trying to get control creates power struggles. Power struggles poison relationships.
The challenge: be in control of yourself and your own behavior. Others will still be trying to control you, and you will still feel frustrated or attacked, but you will experience much less chaos and much greater peace.
Kid's games provide a great image. When someone wants to play Tug-of War, don't take the rope. When you're invited to play Tag with someone, don't chase them. When you find yourself on the teeter-totter with someone, just sit there with your feet planted firmly and allow them to dangle in the air -- don't push off. See the games for what they are, and don't play.
Another great lesson comes from water. Warning signs at a beach with rip currents have these instructions.
Rip currents can kill. Learn how to identify them. If caught in a rip current, don't panic. Swim parallel to shore until current weakens. Then swim to shore.
1. Don't fight the current. 2. Swim out of the current and then to shore. 3. If you can't escape, float or tread water. 4. If you need help, signal for assistance.
Try softer. Understand what you can control, change what you can, and pray for the wisdom to know the difference.