"I know I just keep reacting the same way. I don't know how to respond. I don't know what I'm supposed to do?"
Learning self-control is where to begin. No reaction is a response. It's intentional. Controlling your self, getting a hold of your emotions is a simple concept, but it's not easy.
Get to know yourself. Recognize the signs of an emotional reaction. What are you thinking? How do you feel? Pay attention.
Humans have emotional reactions. Remaining unaware of them can lead to impulsivity and losing control of our self emotionally.
Get some distance. Stop texting. Stop the conversation on the phone or in person. Leave the room. Leave the house. Give yourself time and space.
Calm the emotional reaction. Breath. Inhale to the count of four, hold for a count of two, and exhale to a count of four. Slower breathing calms our emotions and slows down our minds.
Respond with self-control. Whatever you say or do will be more helpful when you have control of your self.